Saturday, November 4, 2017

Crazy Train

It only took around six weeks to hack into my Slow Panic email. Six weeks of thinking about it interspersed with quick attempts at guessing my password, going down the rabbit hole of password recovery, resetting the password, forgetting the password and starting over.

Finally, this morning, I did it.  I opened Blogger and logged in.  

So hi.  Here I am.  

I took a quick and painful look at how long it's been since I blogged, skimmed some really horrible posts from the past (which, sadly, resemble this post very much) and logged into Feedly to see if any of my old blog friends are still blogging.  They are. I've missed them.

Hashtag Slow Panic Loser.

So yes, same old story.  I miss this space and I miss writing and now I'm 50 (WTH) and I have three dogs and one and a half cats and still have one husband and two teenagers.  I am still caretaker for my mom and it is still difficult and painful and sad.

In two weeks we are moving from our very small house to a bigger house. We've been in this house for 21 years.  I don't want to leave and I can't wait to get out of here.  

I'm just as alone as I've always been and more surrounded by people then ever.   

I'm constantly trying to figure out how to get off this crazy train and how to extend the ride forever.  All at the same time.  And I'm taking you with me. 


3 comments:

Common Household Mom said...

Glad to see you here. I hope your move goes well. I'm still around, and still in the sandwich generation with you.

Bibliomama said...

HIIIIII. I JUST said that every time I found a new blog friend via NaBloPoMo they disappeared. SO glad you're back! I have a husband, a dog and two teen-agers (one in senior year) and my mom is still just garden-variety driving me crazy. And I finished my diploma and I'm looking for an actual JOB (gulp). Onward.

Jennifer said...

So happy to see that you're writing again. When does life get less complicated? I suppose on the day right after never.