Tuesday, March 16, 2010

help me

Because birthday parties totally freak me out my children rarely have parties. In fact D7 has only had one. He's turning eight on Friday and he asked to have a party. He never asks for parties so we decided to go ahead and have one.

I sent out invitations last Thursday (FIVE DAYS AGO) and requested an RSVP. The party is Saturday. I have received two responses -- one kid is coming, the other can't make it.

I am freaking out. This is why I do not have parties for my kids. Every single aspect of it makes me a nervous wreck. The planning, the waiting, the actual partying. It's bad. I'm just not one of those mommies.

To make matters worse I gave them my business phone number to call and my e-mail and then Sunday evening I discovered I had UNPLUGGED MY BUSINESS ANSWERING MACHINE. So if anyone tried calling over the weekend they wouldn't get the machine.

So my question for you is this -- is it rude or to desperate for me to send an e-mail tomorrow to ask if kids are coming or not. MH says it's desperate. I'm kind of feeling pretty damn desperate at this point.

So I'm asking my bloggy friends for help. Should I just calm down and wait? Or should I e-mail them?


23 comments:

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

Email them because it's a matter of having enough CAKE! I hate it when people don't RSVP..lately it seems my kids' friends' parents are very good about it, though, and I am thankful. But you are not desperate, you're getting vital information to help prepare and plan a PARTY.
Good luck!

furiousBall said...

email them and calm down. it's obvious that you won't be able to relax until you do email them. so do it and chill :)

Jen said...

Yes email them. Or call and say you need a head count for cake & favors.

I would venture to guess that it has nothing to do with your answering machine--most people don't RSVP.

Bob said...

I'd email them, explain you are trying to get a final count for supplies, and how much you are looking forward to seeing their kids and/or them too.

slow panic said...

it is becoming very obvious to me that i should have married all of you instead of my husband.

slow panic said...

it is becoming very obvious to me that i should have married all of you instead of my husband.

Mommy, I'm Home said...

Definitely email them. The lack of RSVPs is the biggest reason why I quit throwing birthday parties for my daughter...

Karen said...

Calm down and then email them--it's okay...it wouldn't bother me if someone emailed me about a kid's party. And yes--I get into a snit every year about my son's party. Last year we invited 15 of his friends and classmates and only 4 (!!) RSVP'd. But my friend ended up coming and bringing her two older kids, and my husband acted the nut during the whole thing, so all was well. Do your best and let it go (and remind your own child that other kids ALWAYS want to go to a party--if they didn't come, it was probably their own parents' faults!!)

AnastasiaSpeaks said...

Absolutely e-mail them. Just a simple note to see if they are coming. You can even explain about your RSVP business phone and say that you wanted to make sure to check with everyone in case they tried to call but didn't reach you.

My kids are 3 and 4 so the parties are different. I always do evites and even with those sometimes you have to e-mail the moms again to see if the kids are coming. I've done medium sized parties of each and even though it's a whole butt load of work, it's been fun for the boys.

Don't worry, you'll be great.

AnastasiaSpeaks said...

Absolutely e-mail them. Just a simple note to see if they are coming. You can even explain about your RSVP business phone and say that you wanted to make sure to check with everyone in case they tried to call but didn't reach you.

My kids are 3 and 4 so the parties are different. I always do evites and even with those sometimes you have to e-mail the moms again to see if the kids are coming. I've done medium sized parties of each and even though it's a whole butt load of work, it's been fun for the boys.

Don't worry, you'll be great.

Elisa @ Globetrotting in Heels said...

I think it would be ok. Just explain that you weren't aware that the machine was malfunctioning (no reason to spill the beans to everyone ;-)) so you'd like to double check with those who haven't RSVPed.

I understand how you feel, any kind of party makes me nervous too. But it should be ok. Just some food, some games, some cake. a couple of hours, and they will be out of your hair ;-)

Lori said...

Absolutely 100% email them. Tell them the truth, that you inadvertently unplugged your answering machine. And then breathe - breathe - breathe deeply and tell yourself over and over again, "I am smarter than them. I am bigger than them. I can call their mommies and daddies." over and over. :)

Magpie said...

i'd email them. it'll be fine.

Old School/New School Mom said...

I don't think it's rude at all! You have to know if they're coming. Just breathe! It will all be okay!

Mrs. Chili said...

Your misery is in good company. Check this out:

http://theinnerdoor.wordpress.com/2007/06/04/horrors/

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

I would email.

Just say, "I'm trying to get a final count for food for the party. Will _______ be attending?"

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

The last time I threw a party, 50 kids were invited and 130 showed up.

So, things could be worse!

Woman with a Hatchet said...

Definitely email them. No one will think the less of you for it. I, too, have had the birthday invites and only 1 kid showing. Very sad party, that.

V-Grrrl @ Compost Studios said...

E-mail or call. If only two or three kids are coming, it's good to know ahead of time, tell D7, and then just make it fun.

I did parties every year for my kids, up until they were about 8 or 9 years. After that we celebrated by letting them pick one friend to go on a special outing or day trip.

Jen on the Edge said...

Not rude or desperate. It's rude on their parts for not responding.

Neil said...

Not rude or desperate at all. I think it is even polite. And if these are mostly other mothers you are calling, they know exactly how you are feeling.

we_be_toys said...

It's neither rude nor desperate, but your invited guests who haven't RSVP'ed yet are WAY DAMN RUDE!!! Man I hate that. I hate the kid party gig too, for this reason, and because most people aren't going to understand my family's need to have beer at every occasion, including a kid's party. Luckily, we have a large extended family, which is usually enough to make it look like a party, and I can phone them at will and say, "WTF? Are you coming or not?" and no one gets too bent.

Good luck with the party - Birthday Felicitations to your son as well!

Texasholly said...

Seriously, were we separated at birth? I survived Ryan's party...which should give you hope.

TOTALLY email them. It isn't desperate at. all. Especially if you explain that you found out that your machine wasn't working. They may need reminders anyway.

You are going to live through this. And the good news about birthday parties is that there is cake. Eat a lot of cake. It helps.